Most couples have a degree of inter-personal conflict within their romantic relationships. This can for the most part, be healthy as it’s a way of signalling an opportunity for growth. However ongoing and escalating patterns of conflict can lead to relationship breakdown.

This is usually the crisis point when couples will seek out relationship counselling.

There are many reasons why people have difficulties in their relationships this is due to a complex entanglement of beliefs, emotions and behaviours. Couples are generally uncertain where to turn in order to deal with on going problems in their relationships, it is common place to seek advice or support from a close friend or family member, and I am sure they may have your best interest at heart, and their advice or intervention may offer a temporary solution, but unfortunately in most cases it does not identify and resolve the core issues.

Change

Change is one principal that can have an impact on relationships. All relationships go through periods of change, this is an inevitability fact of life, that nothing stays the same. Sometimes the change is fast and sweeping and at other times it is slow and undetectable. By nature people generally do not embrace change, especially if it is out of one’s control or evokes negative emotions. People deal with change in many ways depending on their personal emotional and psychological make up, and their past experiences. People generally grow emotionally and psychologically through change, but at the same time can also grow apart if the change is to rapid or overwhelming.

Emotional needs not being met

Everybody has core emotional needs that they seek to be fulfilled, however many people are unaware of what they need emotionally. At the start of a relationship usually some of these emotional needs do get met consistently, thus the attraction to each other. As the relationship continues and we are confronted by life’s stressors we tend fail to  meet each others emotional needs on a regular basis. This often leads to discontentment and infighting. Relationships require work and are bound to face challenges large and small. Simple, everyday stressors can strain an intimate relationship, and major sources of stress may threaten the stability of the relationship. As long as each partner is willing to address the issue at hand and participate in developing a solution, most relationship problems are manageable.